Lisa asks…

why would my ex boyfriend of 10yrs continue to pay my bills rent car utilities. he left me for another woman?

10 year relationship ended about 3 mos ago. He insists on paying for almost everything, even though he moved in with her immediately, (after I packed him up) He says he loves her

Jason answers:

He could just feel guilty, he could be wanting to keep you waiting in the wings while he sees if the next one works out, in any case cut him loose and refuse any more help from him. Tell him he doesn’t get to be your knight in shining armor if he doesn’t want to be there for you completely.

Mary asks…

Boyfriend denies contacting another woman?

My live-in boyfriend accidentally left his email up on the computer after he left for work the other day. I looked. And I found that an old girlfriend from 10 years ago has contacted him to tell him that she was coming back to our city. She asked him what was going on in his life and if he was married or anything. He told her all about what he’s doing but neglected to mention me, his exclusive girlfriend of 4 years and live-in of 1 year. She asked him if he wanted to “play” when she returned to town, and he told her yes. He’s apparently been calling her on this way home from work on his cell. I told him that I had noticed a difference in his behavior lately and would like to know if he’s seeing another woman or looking for a new relationship. He said no, and he wasn’t. I can’t tell him that I saw the email because it was wrong of me to look. I don’t know what to do. Any suggestions?

Jason answers:

You have some choices. You can confront him with the fact he left his e-mail open, you read it, and he basically planned how he was going to cheat on you with his ex. This will probably lead to a fight, and either breaking up or a strained relationship.

You can push for couples therapy, or try to do something to really reconnect with him. If he says no, there isn’t a lot you can do.

You can dump him. You’ll lose the relationship, but it will make you feel more empowered.

If I were you, I’d dump him. He’s a cheater and a liar. You can do better.

Ken asks…

Boyfriend of 5 years left me and my daughter for another woman!!! Am devastated. words of advice please?

Hi, Im 22 and I have a 2 yr old daughter with a guy I was with 5 years…We were having problems with his responsibility so I would always remind him to buy my daughter diapers, clothes, etc. We would always argue about that. He is clinically depressed and has been using marijuana since he was 15. During our relationship he was using less and less until he stopped for three years. He just started using again this year. He always said I never listened to him and wouldnt show him affection and sometimes I noticed I didnt since we would always argue about him stopping smoking and being responsible. I loved him soo much and still do. I took him to therapy and helped him get a car,job, etc. Now I just found out he cheated on me with an 19 year old who has the audacity to tell me I should leave and give him to her. I found out of his cheating thru her. The OW would call me and we would talk about him…and she said he would leave him alone. He then said we would go to counseling and work it out and that he loved me.

THEN after we were supposedly going to work it out, the next day He picked her in front of his parents and my child. He said he hated me and didnt care about me or my daughter. Now he calls me in front of her to tell me to leave him alone and acts like its my fault and Im the crazy one…worst part is that she says she is pregnant…im so stupid i even apologized to her saying i was sorry she was involved…

He blames me for his cheating. We didnt live together since I was tired of paying for everything and recently I was trying to buy a house…I wonder and wonder if it was my fault…he says I pushed him away. but then i wonder that it was all him…

I can support my daughter I have a good job and a degree…I really dont need him, but no matter what he is my daughters father, he was a good dad until he said that one day he hates me and her. I have no idea what is going on or what I should do, it happened so sudden he was always very sweet and awesome with me….

so if anyone can please help me i would really appreciate it.

Jason answers:

Wow, reality check here. He was not a good dad, a good boyfriend, or anything good for that matter. If he was, he would not have cheated on you. Making it seem like his choices were your fault is only the icing on the cake of his pathetic inability to take responsibility for his life. But then again, what do you expect from a drughead? Consider yourself lucky that he’s out of your and your child’s lives and focus on making better choices for the two of you in future.

Mark asks…

dreams about boyfriend leaving me for another woman?

i had 3 dreams about my boyfriend leaving me for another woman. the first dream he left me for 2 asian women. the 2nd dream he left me for his ex-girlfriend (baby moma), and the third dream he left me for his ex-wife. we have dated since april and it is a great relationship. however, he does have a child from a woman he dated for 3 months. the child is 1 year. he just found out about the child in feb when he was born last year in january. the woman kept it a secret but he found out from child support. he just saw his son for the 1st time in july. he has been divorced for 2 years but is really good friends with the ex. they both have stated that they are better friends divorced then married and they just were not compatible with each other. i believe i feel secure in the relationship -but why am i having dreams about him leaving me? and the dreams have only taking place while i was staying the weekend at his place – in his bed.

Jason answers:

Obviously you DON’T feel secure in your relationship otherwise you wouldn’t be having these dreams. These are deep seeded fears about losing him. You need to get over these fears otherwise you will end up losing him. Insecure women freak men out in a major way. Make peace with these fears. He’s with you for a reason so relax. :)

Daniel asks…

My live-in boyfriend of 4 years left me for another girl and I need some books to cheer me up Any suggestions?

I am not going through a divorce, but I very much feel as though I am. My boyfriend and I lived together for 4 years and are now having to divide all of our things, including the apartment! He left me for another woman, so I don’t need him in my life if that’s the kind of guy that he is, BUT I’m looking for some books that I can read that will help lift my spirits and move on. I have a pretty positive attitude about it to begin with, but any books that help move the process along would be great!

Jason answers:

Wow, I’m really sorry to hear that. I went through a similar situation and I felt like my life was ending I’m so happy to see you are still being positive. Obviously you are a very strong woman. I really don’t know any books to tell you– sitting home by myself and reading didn’t work for me I got really depressed. However, I would recommend talking about it. I went to a support group and it really helped me. You get to meet new people so you aren’t dealing with this alone and I believe it helps people heal quicker. Best of luck to you!

Powered by Yahoo! Answers

Filed under: Uncategorized

Like this post? Subscribe to my RSS feed and get loads more!